BizHawk 2.8.0 on top of Genplus-GX.
EDIT: Went back and saved 3 frames (2 in Cecilia's Apartment and 1 in The CageRoom) by utilizing fall damage glitch and new route on Cecilia's Apartment to save time. Would be really impressed if this is beatable now.).
13:37.35 from first to last input (49,005 frames at 60 frames per second)
Details.
You can either play as Louie or Cecilia. Louie is the faster option in terms of routing. The levels are the same but the first level and third level are swapped which causes you to get the running shoes much slower, albeit available without collecting bubbles. I chose Louie for "the" run (main run, world record), but will be doing and making a slower Cecilia% category later just for the fun of it.
Jumping in this game has no lag, animation lag, or downsides. It only affects your vertical axis and does not affect the horizontal axis whatsoever. Jumping frame-perfect or just running/walking (respectively) have the same exact speed both in the short-term and long-term.
The Docks (Louie route)
I start by killing some rats and collecting their bubbles to accumulated 10 bubbles, the price required to purchase the running shoes. After acquiring the 10 bubbles, I pause on the frame the bubble counter reaches 10 (it does not update any faster, I tried) and purchase the shoes which automatically equip. As long as I don't die (guess what), the items purchased remain with me forever. Unpause and the run command (A Button) are pressed at once, so I can begin running immediately upon unpause. From this point on, bubbles are avoiding unless absolutely necessary, and upon several adjustments, the run is able to completed without collecting anymore bubbles. This does not include large bubbles, which spawn when mini-bosses are defeated and must be collected to trigger the level ending (each). This comes in handy as the large bubbles produce 10 bubbles which are not put to waste...
Anyways, the rest of the level is speedy platforming. The one thing to note is there's a boat, and it is important I: land on the boat on the right frame, at the right position, and at the right speed/offset to avoid sliding off while also triggering the boat to move immediately. Jumping causing the boat to stop for a few frames so damage is taken to avoid jumping whatsoever, using my full 4 health.
Central Park 1 (Flying Version)
Basic flying simulator. Directional movements... nor anything... increase the speed of this level so it is impossible to improve, along with the other flying levels. I ensure to avoid all bubbles. First, they increase a counter at the end of the level on the "level complete" screen which creates a delay of 6 frames per bubble. Secondly, the bubble counter resets at the end of some levels (and even some sections of levels, meaning after the mini-boss but before the end of the level upon switching room in Cecilia's Apartment) but not others. It's buggy. Lastly, the pause screen is just a basic pause screen on the flying levels and cannot be used to purchase items. Literally, the bubbles in this level are useless, and also create a large delay at the end if collected (especially enmasse). I fly to the end avoiding all bubbles, as well as enemies for the useless preservation of life sans looking nice and making the run extra supreme.
Cecilia's Apartment (Louie route)
This level is where fall damage comes into play. If you fall for longer than a certain amount of frames, you die completely, and the level restarts completely from the description screen. Health does not play a role here and it is instant death. I abuse the abilities of tool assisted speedrunning to ensure any large drops are done at the earliest possible frame, meaning the frame prior would result in death but the chosen frame does not and is the first I will survive at.
I drop down as many levels as I can (you cannot drop through the floors), and upon reaching a level where the next level down has a considerable gap to prevent you from doing this or similar methods, I begin routing through the level through the perfect route to reach the ground and then the boss room. Various attempts were made at jumping into the boss door from two upwards diagonals (left and right respectively) to load into the zone before hitting the ground, however this was not even close from either direction and is impossible. The running shoes and/or jumping shoes, among any other power-ups, would not create this result either.
The mini-boss here is basically useless and easily killed by jumping on top of him and waiting. Different methods were used to attempt to make this frame perfect, however the bouncing from hitting the boss preventing reaching the ground and jumping back up in an efficient manner to where just staying on him and bouncing would not be the optimal route. I did get a pattern going this way by jumping on the floor and back up (difficult as the boss moves around as well even when hit and seems to be a bit more feisty as you move around ironically so), but ended up putting Louie in an upwards bump on a different frame as the boss died, creating a 20 frame negative deficit to collecting the bubble and ending the stage.
After collecting the large bubble from the boss I use the earnings to purchase the jumping shoes at the perfect time in the run. They are useless in the first level because there are no large jumps, obviously unused in the flying level, and all of the movement in the first part of the Cecilia's Apartment level is DOWNWARD. Great irony! I collect the bubble, open the menu, purchase the jumping shoes, and continue in a fraction of a second... and onwards!
The jumping shoes are immediately put into use to abuse the staircases ahead, as well as basically constantly abuse the rest of the level, including stairs, platforms, moving platforms, and roofs all just seconds later. SERIOUSLY, OPPORTUNE PURCHASE TIMING. PERFECT.
Eventually I reach Barney The Dinosaur's cocaine-addicted cousin in the middle of a bender, even moreso confused and delirious at my fast movements, and continue to the next level.
The Parade
Horrible auto-scroller. Frame perfect, no damage taken, impossible to improve. Tried to do some bouncing around to make it interesting. Had a more intense version but deleted it because it was a tad obnoxious. I don't need bubbles here so I don't grab any to save time at the level finished screen.
Truck Surfing
Another Dinosaur level. Avoid the balloons(?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????) and oncoming cars. Balloons that do not hit straight on do not hurt you. Read my incentive from the previous flying level, and this one is said.
T.V. Studio
My favorite level in the game. I figured out ladders could be abused by jumping on them as many times as you'd like, the level is laid out very cooly (is that a word?) and makes for a lot of awesome jumps. Damage is taken as needed until I run out of health and must ensure to finish the level without taking any damage, which at this point was fine anyways (besides the boss - holy hell). I also discovered you can jump off of ladders and did so as soon as I could (i.e. fall damage).
You are able to jump a few frames before hitting the floor, and these frames are taken into the fall damage account, allowing me to go ever so slightly further when jumping off ladders if you jump a few frames before landing. It's really nothing to write home about and probably constitutes frames vs. seconds. However this does require an extra jump, so if you're needing to run then jump shortly after, you won't be able to do this. (It'd have to be an instant jump) Note that this does not remove fall damage and only gives you a few extra vertical pixels of wiggle room.
I discovered an interesting series of jumps that allows me to skip a decent chunk of the level towards the end, using a route not intended by the developers.
The coolest boss TAS in all of video gaming
This boss is hell. Literally. He sends out several boomerangs, each with a hitbox, which now as I have 0 health, would send me back to the start of the level and the prior information screen. They are brutal and unforgiving and special movement is taken to avoid them. Avoid them is an understatement. Seriously, watch this. It's probably my favorite thing I've ever TASed and the end result is nothing short of amazing. Between navigating the flying boomerangs and hitting the boss, I found a route that allowed me to hit the boss in as few frames as possible through lots of different combination attempts. Incase this part looks imperfect, remember that slight movements would alter my course into the boomerangs, and remember the millions of combinations not shown in the video but experienced in-person in save states. There's a reason for every movement.
After I kill the boss (watching out for the one remaining boomerang which yes can still kill you and restart you long after the boss has died), I ironically purchase the boomerang (you can do this anywhere, purely coincidental) for the use on my large travels.
Scooter Ride
This level sucks. All you have to do is move slightly to the right and it's over (figuratively). No movement is required other than a half second or so of positioning. Again, read the prior details on my standards for this level. The dinosaur is also complete with anatomy, and this is the stillest run in the world to stare at it.
Central Park 2 (Walking Version)
Pretty basic side-scrolling level. Avoid the pits. This level has a lot of hills and some of the enemies are impossible to avoid without turning back so I just plow through them and take damage.
The mini-boss here does not die from damage but rather from falling into a pit. Riding his back like the first boss is slower as you have tree branches to utilize instead of needing to fall up and then down to the ground, so a perfected route is used to get the battle as frame perfect as possible. At the end, I jump and run forward towards the exit, then turn back for a frame and boomerang him for the final hit before instantly proceeding. His death can't be seen but he falls into the pit and you can see the exact frame this happens on the USELESS score counter. His death spawns the loading zone at the end border of the level.
Circus Grounds
Lots of monkeying around. Those stupid platforms the monkeys sit on is super picky, and you have to jump on them at the right angle to use them (else they will not bounce), and avoiding them is impossible by a few frames of jump height. You also need to avoid jumping on the monkeys as this will cause you to bounce, preventing a real jump. Special movement and routing is used to avoid rubbing on the sides of wooden boxes which will slow you down. It's impossible (or useless) to do this completely, i.e. slowing your jumps to avoid rubbing them ends up costing even more time, so it's about jumping at full power at the opportune time to do it as little as possible instead.
Circus Tent
This level is pretty fun. Ladders are back again, and now these giant blue scaffoldings that cannot be walked through at any level. There are water pools which allow you to mitigate fall damage even if you hit them pixel perfect basically outside of them. The trampolines take 3 or 4 jumps (UP AND DOWN) to get up to a (still subpar) height, so I opt to just do some parkour and skip most of them but still abuse their sister pools to allow me to mitigate fall damage.
The CageRoom
I have to collect the keys to let our other dinosaur friends out of cages. For the first time ever this is not the time when Barney The Dinosaur's cousin is not the one behind bars. Anyways, this is some amazing platforming. I hit the cages frame perfect (I mean everything is frame perfect) to unlock them and jump either prior or immediately depending on what is required, to move on. The last key can be acquired using an exact jump to avoid needing to get onto the platform it is on until it is time to leave, also convieniently plummeting you towards the third and last cage.
The last part of level with the stupid birds (which were enemies in the second level and now helping you both here and the boss fight, likely because level 2 was Borney's (as I have named) and they are so traumatized they know what is best.) is as fast as it can be (emphasis: slow) because of the fall damage woes.
Towards the end I jump into the loading zone for the dinosaur leg (your friends are assholes) to load it early to make navigating it later cut and dry, and also because it turns the birds orange due to a glitch and looks cool, and I'm still waiting on this damn bird to land anyways.
The final boss basically involves using your doubly traumatized bird friends to fight him. This battle is frame perfect and impossible to improve thanks to the birds taking forever to want to be touched. If you touch them early, nothing with happen, so you have to wait until the exact offset to start jumping to hit them at the exact frame.
No damage is taken here and the game ends. It was a fun journey!
Samsara: The author has resubmitted. Cancelling.