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Posted: 11/30/2004 3:20 AM
Post subject: Cheetahmen II
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
Alright Folks. Here it is. A speed run of the worst game ever. Ever. To keep things brief, you can read up on everything about this game and its history here. Pretty frightening what they had planned. To those too lazy to go there, I'll explain some stuff as they pertain to the run. First of all, there are six levels, but only four are accessible thanks to a glitch with the second boss. One can access the last two levels, but you need a patched ROM or lots of luck on a console, so this run only does the first four levels. There is also a really funny jumping glitch that allows the close-combat cheetahs to jump indefinetly. I'll be utilizing that. There are also some collision problems, but they don't really speed things up. It just looks cool. This run is currently a work in progress. I have just beaten the first boss, Dr. Morbis, at 1:10, but I'll have to redo the entire second level in order to shorten the time spent on the transition screen. I am aiming for the fastest time, killing everything that doesn't slow me down to destroy. Apollo's levels were a breeze to play through, and I am pleased with the result. Herc's levels, however, are going to require a bit more planning. Herc's attack requires that he pauses for half a second, so I can't run-and-gun through his levels like Apollo can. I'm going to have to decide which enemies to destroy, which to barge through, and when it's fastest to do the jump glitch. Unfortunately, I forgot my Filespace password, so you can't see it now; I'll post a link as soon as I can get my account back up and running. If this run gets published, I believe it will be the site's first run of an unlicensed game. :)
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 11/30/2004 3:49 AM
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nesrocks
He/Him
Player (241)
Joined: 5/1/2004
Posts: 4096
Location: Rio, Brazil
yea well it might be interesting to exploit the glitches in the game and.... wait a second... the game is MADE of glitches!! yucks! you're gonna have to make that cheetah go upside down because the game is BAD, and the music!! if you can keep shooting or something so that the music isnt played i think it's for the best. this game is not a hack, it's unlicensed, i dont know if it's in for publishing.. i would watch it though, because i could never get past the first level, i never figured if the plataforms are enemies or vice-versa O_o
aka Nesrocks http://www.youtube.com/user/UoBtExFODA https://nesrocks.com https://twitter.com/bitinkstudios
Posted: 11/30/2004 4:10 AM
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
FODA wrote:
wait a second... the game is MADE of glitches!!
Strangely enough, I almost said the exact same thing! :D
FODA wrote:
if you can keep shooting or something so that the music isnt played i think it's for the best.
If it's any consolation, the music plays for only nine seconds of the thirty-four spent in the first level. Twenty-one enemies nailed and four hits taken. I likes it.
FODA wrote:
this game is not a hack, it's unlicensed, i dont know if it's in for publishing..
I haven't seen anything in the rules or guidelines against unlicensed games, just hacks.
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 11/30/2004 4:18 AM
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nesrocks
He/Him
Player (241)
Joined: 5/1/2004
Posts: 4096
Location: Rio, Brazil
well then cool i hope it gets published :)
aka Nesrocks http://www.youtube.com/user/UoBtExFODA https://nesrocks.com https://twitter.com/bitinkstudios
Posted: 11/30/2004 5:17 AM
(Edited: 11/30/2004 5:40 AM)
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ventuz
He/Him
Player (123)
Joined: 10/4/2004
Posts: 940
Ferret Warlord wrote:
I haven't seen anything in the rules or guidelines against unlicensed games, just hacks.
is "Unlicensed" game just same as "Private" game? -edit. oh yesyes.. "pirate"-
Posted: 11/30/2004 5:30 AM
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
I think you mean "Pirate." I don't think they are. Pirate games are bootlegged copies of an otherwise legitimate game, usually sold for less than the real deal with different packaging and sometimes a name change. Unlicensed games are those games where a developer went ahead and made a game without the hardware producer's permission. These things are usually different from liscensed games: different media style (seen in most unlicensed NES games, i.e. Tengen cartridges don't look like your average NES cartridge), nothing referring to the hardware's company, and more often than not suck harder than a black hole. Edit: Just got done with it. 8260 frames, 1012 redoes, a score of 24700, and a finishing time of 2:25, more than a minute off of my initial prediction. I'll get in on my Filespace as soon as I get this password situation resolved.
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 11/30/2004 8:57 AM
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Mr._Kelly_R._Flewin
Joined: 5/29/2004
Posts: 757
I hope it never gets up there and the video never released... it's cruel and unusual punishment man! Think of the children!!! And this is coming from someone who OWNS the game! [I'm a collector, what can I say] This video WOULD BE A WMD! :) Alright, on a serious note [I was kidding about all above save for being a collector].. I don't know how you stomached this game that long... seriously.. and did you go for the power off/on access level 5 trick? Mr. Kelly R. Flewin
Mr. Kelly R. Flewin Just another random gamer ---- <OmnipotentEntity> How do you people get bored in the span of 10 seconds? Worst ADD ever.
Posted: 11/30/2004 2:49 PM
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Josh_the_FunkDOC
Former player
Joined: 3/13/2004
Posts: 706
Location: Elyria/Oberlin, OH
... ... ... Oh. My. God. Folks, I thought Wayne's World was about as bad as it can get. Oh, how wrong I was...this, without question, is the "Manos" of video games. I *so* want to see this run. =D -Josh
but then you take my 75 perchance chance of winning, if we was to go one-on-one, and then add 66 and two-thirds ch...percents...i got a 141 and two-thirds chance of winning at sacrifice
Posted: 11/30/2004 4:37 PM
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
I don't know, Kelly. I guess I just have a higher resistance to bad games than normal. Heck, I found ET to be somewhat enjoyable! ;D I seriously don't see how the power off-on thing would work for an emulator. At least with a console you can leave a charge in the cartridge; I think that may be causing the skip. And since this place doesn't like hacks and patches, the last two levels will not be done. Edit: Forgot to mention I got the frames wrong. 8680.
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 11/30/2004 4:49 PM
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BoltR
Former player
Joined: 8/12/2004
Posts: 651
Location: Alberta, Canada
I didn't hate ET THAT much, although I only played it like twice. I also didn't pay for it, which might have something to do with it...
Posted: 11/30/2004 8:42 PM
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Booda
Joined: 4/26/2004
Posts: 149
E.T. is pretty horrible, although I don't think it technically has any glitches (as if I'd play long enough to find out). I've been refraining from naming utterly horrible NES games because, well, they're horrible. However, if people are having fun doing runs of bad games (note: Deadly Towers and Super Pitfall are also considered "Manos" games), Cheetahmen may open the way for such anti-classics as X-Men. Is that what we want? Well, I guess it's kind of like, "the most gruesome and disgusting movie you'll ever see." People want to see it just to judge for themselves if it's really that bad. I've played E.T., but I've never even heard of Cheetahmen II. Is it really that bad?
Posted: 11/30/2004 9:16 PM
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Josh_the_FunkDOC
Former player
Joined: 3/13/2004
Posts: 706
Location: Elyria/Oberlin, OH
Hell, Dark Castle got published specifically because it's such a laughably bad game, IIRC. I've been thinking about doing Wayne's World, but to be entertaining it can't be a true timeattack; you'd have to show off Wayne's spinning karate kick of death (which is never worth using) and show everyone the awful dialogue (badly butchered snippets of the old SNL skits). But no...Cheetahmen II beats them all. Let me put it this way: - Manos was the product of a fertilizer salesman from Texas who had no prior filmmaking experience; Cheetahmen II was the product of a company which had almost no prior experience in making games (Action 52 was all they had ever done to that point, and a lot of the stuff on there was probably old graphics demos or somesuch). - Manos was a way-outside-Hollywood project; Cheetahmen II was an unlicensed game. - Manos was made on a $20,000 budget; I don't know the figures, but Cheetahmen II couldn't have cost very much at all to make. - Hal Warren (the fertilizer salesman, for those not familiar) promised that Manos would be a Hollywood-quality horror film; the people behind Cheetahmen II promised that the Cheetahmen would be one of the hottest properties in America by the time Christmas came around. - Manos features a lot of butt-ugly scenery; Cheetahmen II features a lot of butt-ugly scenery. - Manos features an astoundingly wide variety of technical flaws, most notably the fact that the film's one and only camera couldn't record sound (all of the dialogue was dubbed, by three people IIRC); Cheetahmen II features an extensive list of technical flaws, most notably the fact that the game locks up after level 4 and prevents you from playing the last two levels. I'm sure there's more, but you get the idea. -Josh
but then you take my 75 perchance chance of winning, if we was to go one-on-one, and then add 66 and two-thirds ch...percents...i got a 141 and two-thirds chance of winning at sacrifice
Posted: 11/30/2004 9:33 PM
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Josh_the_FunkDOC
Former player
Joined: 3/13/2004
Posts: 706
Location: Elyria/Oberlin, OH
It's a movie, made in 1965 I believe. The full name is "Manos" The Hands of Fate, and yes those are quotation marks present for absolutely no reason; what makes it even funnier is that "manos" is Spanish for "hands", so the proper title would be "Hands" The Hands of Fate. It's considered by many to be the absolute worst film ever made, and I already mentioned some of the parallels it has with Cheetahmen II. Actually, here's another one: - Manos quickly faded into obscurity, but gained interest when the TV show Mystery Science Theater 3000 showed it in what is considered to be one of its all-time best episodes; Cheetahmen II quickly faded into obscurity, but (IIRC) gained interest when a man who had 1500 copies of it in a warehouse sold them all to a collector, who in turn sold them to various people, mostly collectors and at least one who dumped the ROM. EDIT: Did you delete your post, Ferret? -Josh
but then you take my 75 perchance chance of winning, if we was to go one-on-one, and then add 66 and two-thirds ch...percents...i got a 141 and two-thirds chance of winning at sacrifice
Posted: 12/1/2004 2:19 AM
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
Yeah, I did. You had answered my question just as I was asking it so I didn't see it. I deleted it so this topic wouldn't be cluttered up with redundant posts. What was the timeframe "Manos" was made in? Cheetahmen II's copyright says 1992; in contrast, Super Mario 3 was released in Japan four years prior if GameFAQs is anything to go by.
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 12/1/2004 2:32 AM
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Josh_the_FunkDOC
Former player
Joined: 3/13/2004
Posts: 706
Location: Elyria/Oberlin, OH
Manos was made during 1965-66, released in '66...to continue with the theme of parallels, this was about 5-6 years after Psycho, if the IMDB is to be believed. And here's another one: - The first 15 minutes of Manos is mostly a guy driving; playing Cheetahmen II for 15 minutes is about as exciting as watching a guy driving. =P Anyway, I won't keep this thread off-topic anymore. Can't wait to see the run, and I am saying this completely without sarcasm. -Josh
but then you take my 75 perchance chance of winning, if we was to go one-on-one, and then add 66 and two-thirds ch...percents...i got a 141 and two-thirds chance of winning at sacrifice
Posted: 12/1/2004 2:45 AM
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Blublu
Player (67)
Joined: 3/11/2004
Posts: 1058
Location: Reykjaví­k, Ísland
Oh man, just reading this thread makes me want to play this game. Sounds like something that would be reviewed on somethingawful.com.
Posted: 12/1/2004 2:58 AM
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Bag_of_Magic_Food
He/Him
Active player (278)
Joined: 5/29/2004
Posts: 5712
They did review Action 52, which contains the original Cheetahmen.
put yourself in my rocketpack if that poochie is one outrageous dude
Posted: 12/1/2004 3:30 AM
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Dr._Morbis
Joined: 11/27/2004
Posts: 29
Location: Calgary, AB
The good thing about a time attack of a really bad game is that it gives people a chance to see the whole game and what makes it so bad. Most people would try Cheetahmen II for about 10 seconds then turn it off in disgust and never touch it again. With this time attack, viewers will get to see all of the many ways in which this game is bad, not just the first screen of the first level. I can't stand playing 2600 ET, but if someone did a quick time attack of it, I would love to see what that game looks like from start to finish without having to suffer through playing it. FWIW, I think that Cheetahmen II's story is decent, and the preview that plays before you start is 1000% better than the actual game.
Posted: 12/1/2004 3:35 AM
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BoltR
Former player
Joined: 8/12/2004
Posts: 651
Location: Alberta, Canada
Honestly, if you have gotten into the game, you have seen it all. You walk from screen to screen, and fall into holes. Sometimes at the bottom of a hole there is a peice of a telephone, if it is there you pick it up. You then leave the whole by pushing the button to extend your neck, and then pushing it again to pull your body up to where your head is. You repeat this process until your out of the whole. You then continue to walk around falling down holes until you find the rest of the phone. When you get all the phone pieces you go to surface and call home. You are then picked up by a box and win the game. I beleive there are 3 pieces to the phone, so it's possible to win by only going down three holes. If I remember this can take as low as 10 seconds. By changing the difficulty switches you can toggle the presence of the police and your parents, which I beleive look the same. They appear randomly on some screens, and if they touch you, you lose. Falling down a hole, or leaving the screen makes them go away. That is the game of ET.
Posted: 12/1/2004 4:19 PM
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-ziplock-
Former player
Joined: 9/26/2004
Posts: 217
So, after Cheetahmen 1, the consumers just said, "Don't tease us! Where's part 2???" I've never heard of anything like this before - worse than all the worst games?
Posted: 12/1/2004 6:57 PM
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
If Brent doesn't respond when I get home from work tonight, I send him another e-mail requesting assistance. If I don't get my account working by Friday evening, I'll have to borrow someone else's file server. "Why don't you just publish it?" A). I'd like to get some feedback on it first. B). It isn't the final version. There is a small stylistic mistake in the last ten seconds that I'll have to do something about. C). I'll be letting someone else publish it, if it's alright with him. And yes, this game is considered to be the worst of the worst by those who have played it. At least the CDi Zeldas had some decent graphic design and ET is mostly bug free as far as I know.
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 12/2/2004 1:12 AM
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yarbles
Joined: 8/1/2004
Posts: 143
Location: Colorado
Ferret....PM me, I'd be willing to host the file for you in the interim.
Posted: 12/2/2004 3:37 AM
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Ferret_Warlord
Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 10/27/2004
Posts: 1977
Location: Making an escape
Atchscray number C). Looks like I'll be the one submitting it.
A hundred years from now, they will gaze upon my work and marvel at my skills but never know my name. And that will be good enough for me.
Posted: 12/2/2004 5:31 AM
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yarbles
Joined: 8/1/2004
Posts: 143
Location: Colorado
Ferret Warlord's video can be downloaded here
Posted: 12/2/2004 4:50 PM
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TheAxeMan
Ambassador, Experienced player (697)
Joined: 7/17/2004
Posts: 985
Location: The FLOATING CASTLE
Holy cow, the terrible factor on this game is just amazing. Did anyone watch the opening sequence? It's right up there with "all your base." With how short this video is, I think it might be worth including this in the video, it would be the most entertaining part.
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