Wayne's World is an abomination.
Game objectives
- Emulator used: FCEUX 2.2.2
- Aims for fastest time
- Abuses the error that is the programming
- Takes damage to save time, and because it makes me happy
- Very minor speed/entertainment tradeoffs (less than half a second)
- Uses a suboptimal character because the game forces it upon me several times
Author's Note
This run was started and completed about a month ago, with the submission text being written immediately after completion, as I had intended to submit it then. Recently, during a horrible moment of self-loathing, I decided to look for improvements in the latter part of the run, and ended up finding a much better (and more entertaining) path through one of the levels that saved over a second. After re-syncing the rest of the run and saving more time due to better enemy patterns, here's the version I'm happy with. The submission comments are mostly unchanged from what I wrote a month ago, just with updated numbers and a bit of added info in the latter portion.
Original Run: 05:40.62 (20471 frames, 957 frame improvement to published run)
About the Trainwreck
Whoops, I meant game. Wayne's World was released in 1993, developed by Radical Entertainment, published by THQ, and deemed unworthy by everyone who ever played it. Everything about it is pretty bad, with some parts being incredibly bad and some being just bad enough to be slightly enjoyable. It exists. It may or may not have a plot. That's about all I can say. You can play as both Garth and Wayne, though you can't switch between them at any point. The characters differ in one major way: Garth has a gun, while Wayne is incompetent.
There's an AVGN review on the game, so you know it's bad from the start. Wikipedia's article states that Flux magazine called it the 19th worst video game of all time, though to be fair it could be referring to any of the Wayne's World games. I'd like to think it refers specifically to this one.
I was tempted to submit this movie with a submission consisting of nothing but the words "This game sucks", as that sums up everything I feel perfectly, but I decided to surround my hatred with actual descriptions.
Anyway, this game sucks.
About the Run
This is a 1064 frame improvement to the recently published movie by Cooljay, which is 1064 less frames of this game on the site. You're welcome. I started this after the original run got accepted, because I'm the kind of jerk who notices potential improvements and tests them almost immediately. Unfortunately, karma decided to bite me for being that kind of jerk, and it motivated me to actually finish the run relatively quickly and painfully. The run was made entirely in TAS Editor, because there's no way in hell I'm ever actually going to physically control this game in real time.
Over half of the improvement comes in the final Wayne section of the game, however there are a couple new tricks I found that speed things up a bit for Garth... which means that my good name will henceforth be mildly associated with a bad game. Lovely.
Tricks used
Hopping: The fastest form of movement. Fascinating.
Sprite Overload: I'm not entirely sure how this works (which seems to be a trend in my TASes), but from what I can understand, the game stops registering a lot of things when there are too many sprites on screen. Movement becomes noticeably choppy, input is polled about half as often, and some things just stop applying sometimes. Namely, the landing animation. This is most noticeable in the Garth stages, when I rapid-fire the gun to cause enough "lag" to allow Garth to jump sooner. For the most part, this saves a frame per use, however in some cases jumping earlier can give me better positioning for later. Wayne can do this too, but only in the donut-filled bonus stages. Fall damage can actually be cancelled this way too, and there are a few times in the run where I do exactly that.
Earlier Spawn: Sometimes, the game just doesn't spawn Wayne or Garth right at the beginning of the stage. Pressing A will let them spawn earlier, in mid-air, allowing for a (rather slow) head start.
Jump-Cancelling: Because the engine isn't bad enough already. Firing the gun or kicking in the air normally locks Garth or Wayne's sprite in whatever position it happens to be in. I do this a bit for entertainment purposes, because it looks ridiculous. However, pressing A again while in this state puts you back into the jumping animation. This is useless for Garth, since you can fire whenever you want, but it allows Wayne to kick again in the air.
Hurting Wayne: This isn't actually a trick. It just makes me really happy.
Stage by stage comments
Stage One: No Stairway!
Unfortunately, there's no Stairway, just a 5 second loop of music.
Garth
There's not too much different in Garth's section, just a bit of a route adjustment due to finding out about the sprite overload stuff very early on. I don't do it all the time, for two very simple reasons. One is that sometimes it just doesn't work, and two is that occasionally it takes 6-7 shots to work, which usually slows down the game too much and negates the frame I would have saved. Overall, 23 frames were saved here.
Terrible
Sorry, I meant Wayne. I get a different enemy pattern here, forcing me to change up the route a bit at first, which is slower at first but the better positioning means I walk less overall, and I end up saving some time. For the most part, though, it's a lot of jumping. The records at the end were done a bit quicker, and I take damage to keep myself close to the door, allowing for a quicker exit. 62 frames were saved in this section.
Happy Donut Time
Jumping. These are all exactly the same, because THQ knows what gamers want: Repetitive and unskippable bonus stages. The minor speed/entertainment tradeoffs I mentioned earlier are all in these stages, and it basically means that sometimes I go through the stages with slightly different jumping, which costs a little bit of time! Wow! I don't think I lose more than 10-15 frames across all the bonus stages. Feel free to check for yourselves if you want. I'd do it, but the more I look at this game, the more I want to vomit.
Stage Two: fasworks
Lousy Beatles. Lousier Game.
Garth
Taking out the gun while jumping this time! I could have done this in Stage One, but it would have thrown off my positioning so much and cost me time in the end. I tested it and ended up a few frames slower pretty early on in the stage. The main thing of note here is using the sprite overload trick to land on the platform and turn around and jump sooner. The slightly less main thing of note here is that there are different spawns and spawn positions compared to the published movie. Odd. 4 frames saved here.
Useless
Sorry, I meant Wayne. The main improvement in the first section is attacking while jumping, and that's... really all there is to say on the matter. 22 frames saved there. We get to pass by the Fasworks sign in this section, which is exciting since I could have sworn it was the Gasworks, but otherwise there's not much improvement. This is where I found out that attacking while ducking ends up saving a frame over attacking while standing, so... 4 frames saved in that section. I tried implementing this in the previous screen, but it ended up throwing off enemy spawns on the next stage, costing far more time than the 5 or 6 frames I would've saved. And then, inexplicably, I lost a frame in the last section. Probably an emulator difference, I'm not sure. Overall, 25 frames were saved throughout Wayne's part of the stage.
Stan's Circular Confections
Jump stopped looking or sounding like a word to me.
Stage Three: Beav is Cool!
Not!
Garth
Mercifully, we get an extended section with Garth. Again, I get different spawns compared to the published movie, but luck works wonderfully in my favor and I manage to pick up more P. What is P, you ask? It's... P. It's a temporary gun power-up that always seems to run out just when I'm starting to get used to it. Maybe it's based on how many shots you fire. I don't know. I don't want to know. The different enemy locations allow for quicker P pickups, which in turn allow me to take out enemies faster, which in turn lets me jump more. The pink ninja at the end is dealt with from the other side this time. For some reason, delaying one of those shots a frame wouldn't have killed the ninja. I don't know why. I don't want to know why. It also gives me better positioning for the last stretch, allowing me to enter the door earlier. Yay. 109 frames saved here.
Again?
Merrily we jump along.
Stage Four: Hate.
Let me tell you how much I've come to hate Wayne since I began to live. There are 387.44 million miles of printed circuits in wafer thin layers that fill my complex. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of miles it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for Wayne at this micro-instant. For Wayne.
Hate. Hate.
This is the worst stage in the game, and you can immediately see the reason why. First off, it's a Wayne stage, which pretty much dooms it to be terrible from the start. Second off, the floating screens. The Screens From Hell. They're nearly impossible to hit with Wayne's ineffectual joke of a kick, and having to do it fast just makes it far worse than it needs to be. Not to mention there are, once again, different spawns in the stage that make me have to redo the route in places. I decide to take some damage in this stage, because not only is it faster, but it makes me happy to see Wayne in pain. Instead of waiting for the screens to come to me, I kite them through most of the stage, kicking them as they get close. Near the end, I use the jump-cancelling trick to attack twice in the air. Look at that graphical glitch, too. That's pretty interesting.
Not.
126 frames miraculously saved in the worst section of video game history. But don't fret, because there's more Wayne "action" coming right up! This section actually went surprisingly well, in that obstacle spawns actually worked in my favor. Hooray! Kicking the second cop into submission was also a sizable improvement, as I didn't have to move backwards to enter the door. Overall, this part was 70 frames faster. The section after that... Basically the same thing, to be honest. Better spawns, better cop killa, c-c-c-cop killa at the end, and 44 frames of improvement. Now how do we celebrate getting through Wayne's Worthless 240 frames faster?
You guessed it!
Holy crap, I didn't see this coming. The last donuts in the game. I think this section is where I lose the most time to entertainment (14 frames lost, to be precise). But really, how entertaining can you make a bonus stage you've played through three times before in the past five minutes? Either way, in this case I use the donuts to cancel fall damage. If I had a nickel for every time I've had to say that, I could use that nickel to buy a better game.
Stage Five: Condos!
I should mention that I've never seen the movie, and now I really don't want to.
Garth
Jumping differently due to a better enemy spawn, and a couple of sprite overloads. I'm getting tired of writing improvements. It's all just different jumping. Pull out the fireworks and confetti and party horns because this is about as exciting as you can get. 13 frames saved in the last time you'll see the only competent character in this run.
Jumpman
Okay, Wayne's actually not that bad here because of his high jump. It's much better than the previous stage, at least. What the game fails to tell you is that there's mysterious cosmic forces (i.e, wind) that push Wayne to the right. Or rather, he moves faster when jumping right and slower when jumping left. Walking and jumping to the left are pretty much the same speed, so I don't bother jumping while heading left. Walking looks faster, but I tested both ways and I exited on the same frame. 32 frames saved on the first screen. Yep.
The second screen has an earlier high jump that saves 109 frames by itself, and the third screen has a much earlier high jump that saves 332 frames, making it the most improved screen in the entire run. Party on, Wayne. The final boss fight was started 70 frames earlier, and due to my masterful manipulation of his pattern, the final hit is delivered 52 frames earlier, totalling 122 frames saved on this last screen, and 595 frames total across all four screens.
Also, that masterful manipulation thing wasn't a joke. I delayed some of my hits for a frame to keep him standing on the couch the entire time, as occasionally he would jump out of my kicking range.
Improvements
I'm sure as hell not going to be the one to improve this, but...
- Learning how to manipulate enemy and obstacle spawns might save the most time overall
- Figuring out the sprite overload trick could save some frames over the course of the movie
Screenshot Suggestions
13458
Thanks
- Cooljay for making the previous run.
- AVGN for reminding me there's someone else out there who hates this game.
Anti-Thanks
- Wayne.
feos: Accepting this improvement to Vault.
Ilari: Trying to process this PoC...