VEGAS STAKES: a Fanfic Inspired by TASVideos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUmoYb-LMlU
Prologue: High Stakes in Vegas
Some people called him The Man With No Name, but he preferred to call himself Mr., his legal name. Mr. was the youngest of four brothers; the oldest was Joe, a flourishing software engineer who had moved to Las Vegas, Nevada ten years ago. Mr. and his older brothers Cliff and Richard worked at a McDonald's in Sedona, Arizona, and were not very rich. After 8 hours of flipping burgers every day, Mr., Cliff, and Richard would return to the three-bedroom apartment they shared with Cliff's wife Isabelle and Richard's wife Maria, hoping for a better opportunity to come up so they could better manage to pay their bills.
On the fateful evening of July 20, 2013, Mr. got a phone call from Joe. "Hello, Mr.!" Joe greeted him. "I've got fantastic news! I've been doing this computer crap for over a decade, but I finally managed to save up enough money to follow my dream of starting my own gourmet burger restaurant here in Vegas!"
"Gourmet burgers, huh?" Mr. said. "I hope you make lots of money, Joe. You've always had better luck than me. I'm still working at McDonald's after a decade."
"Maybe I
have had better luck than you," Joe replied, "but now I want to share that luck! I'm inviting you to come to Vegas for the grand opening of Joe's Burger Gallery,
and I'd like to utilize your experience and that of your brothers! You will be my employees!"
Mr., who was eating a hamburger at the time, dropped it out of shock, leaving a ketchup stain on his shirt. "You're kidding!"
"Nope!" Joe stated. "I've already made reservations for you, Cliff, and Richard at the Golden Paradise hotel just nearby! I'll pay you back for your travel expenses when you get here! Sorry for the short notice; the hotel was completely booked for the next month."
"Thank you, Joe! Thank you!" Mr. hung up the phone and hurriedly gathered his brothers and sisters-in-law for an over 4-hour car ride to Las Vegas, forgetting to bring such essentials as a change of clothes in his excitement.
"When are we going to get there?" Cliff moaned 4 hours into the ride. "I am so tired of riding in this car."
"Oh quit complaining," Isabelle responded, elbowing her husband. "We'll be there soon enough."
"Well, it'll be nice to stretch my legs and walk around," Maria added.
"I'm not complaining," Cliff said, elbowing his wife back, "just anxious to get there."
"Black Jack, Slots, Roulette, Craps and Poker," Maria cogitated. "Which game should I play first?"
"Will you shut up about gambling already?" Mr. shouted. "We're not going to Vegas for the casinos. We're going to meet my brother and work at Joe's Burger Gallery. Just because Golden Paradise Hotel offers gambling does
not mean we are obligated to partake of it."
"Well, I'm heading right to the poker table," Isabelle replied. "That's where I'll make my riches."
"I hope I don't lose my shirt, like I did the last time I went to Las Vegas," Richard said.
Mr. wanted to facepalm, but he had to use his hands to hold the steering wheel and maneuver the car.
Finally, they arrived at the hotel's parking lot and entered the lobby. "Welcome to THE GOLDEN PARADISE HOTEL", greeted the front desk clerk. "Checking in? Please write your name."
Mr. grabbed the pen, but it was out of ink and wouldn't write. "I'm Mr.," he stated.
"Yes, Mr.. We certainly have your reservation," the clerk replied. "We'll show you to your room. Please follow me."
Mr. and his travelling partners were led to rooms 2425, 2432, and 4018 of the hotel and handed their keys so they could enter. Mr. immediately flopped onto the bed. "I should probably get a good amount of rest tonight so I can attend the grand opening tomorrow morning." No more than a couple of minutes later, the hotel phone rang. "Hello?" Mr. answered it.
"Do you want to see Joe again?" asked a digitally disguised voice on the other end.
"Who is this?" Mr. asked.
"I asked you a question. Do you want to see Joe again?"
"Of course I would. He's my brother."
"I've got him as a hostage here. If you want to see your brother again, alive, you're going to need to pay a $10,000,000 ransom."
"Ten million bucks?" Mr. shouted. "There must be some mistake! I only have a thousand in my wallet! Can't you offer a smaller ransom?"
"I can cut a few million off if you'd prefer to see your brother dead!"
"I don't have ten million dollars!" Mr. repeated.
"You'd better find some way to change your financial situation before the scheduled grand opening of Joe's restaurant in 24 hours, then. Sayonara!" The mysterious caller hung up.
Cliff and Isabelle were watching a pay-per-view movie when their hotel phone rang. "Hey, Mr.!" Cliff answered. "What's up?"
"Hello, Cliff? How about going to the casino with me?" Mr. asked.
"Sure!" Cliff answered. "Wait for me in the lobby. I'll be right there. Why are you suddenly so interested in gambling? You seemed so risk-averse a few minutes ago."
"Joe's been kidnapped!" Mr. panicked. "The ransom demand is $10,000,000! I think his life is in grave danger if I don't raise the money within 24 hours!"
"Jesus crap!" Cliff yelped. "So you're going to try to win the money by gambling?"
"I have only $1,000 in my wallet! The risk of losing my brother is worth losing a thousand bucks!"
Thus, Cliff and Mr. met in the Golden Paradise lobby and prepared for the adventure of a lifetime. . . .
Chapter 1: Beating the Dealer
"So, how are we going to turn $1,000 into $10,000,000 within 24 hours?" Mr. asked Cliff.
"No sweat!" Cliff said. "I've learned how to count cards in blackjack, so we can beat the house at that game and accumulate some wealth."
"I've heard the 2020 has higher betting limits," Mr. suggested.
"Maybe we'll go there later, but right now, we need to stay here at the Golden Paradise with its $250 betting limits. We only have $1,000, after all. We can't afford to lose it all on the very first hand. We have to play enough hands that we can count the cards and then start taking advantage of that before we get a lot."
Mr. and Cliff sat down at the Golden Paradise blackjack table. As the dealer shuffled the cards, a female stranger with long brown hair sat down. "Mr., you have a spot on your shirt. Here, let me wipe it off of you."
"She might be a pickpocket!" Cliff warned. "Don't you find it suspicious that she knows your name?"
"No need to be cautious!" Mr. answered. "She looks completely trustworthy."
"No problem," the female answered as she moistened a napkin to remove Mr.'s ketchup stain. "You see? All gone. Let me give you this lottery ticket. I found it earlier, but I don't need it. You keep it."
"See, Cliff?" Mr. said. "Haven't you heard of the Las Vegas custom of giving lottery tickets to people with dirty shirts?"
Cliff shook his head. "I. . . don't think I've heard of that custom. Now, let's do blackjack."
"Actually, I'd rather play craps, if you don't mind."
"Don't you want to bet on this game?"
"No."
Cliff looked to his side and saw the winning lottery ticket number displayed on a video screen. "The winning number is. . ." he said, squinting to view the number. "348. . . what!? Mr., you have won!"
Mr. turned his head to look at the same video screen, then looked down at his ticket. "Geez, you're right! This ticket's worth $100,000!"
A marching band hired by the casino to congratulate winning players walked up to Mr. and Cliff and played a glorious fanfare. One of them held a flashing neon sign with the word "congratulations". After some clapping, the front desk clerk joined them. "Mr., I've got great news for you," he stated. "Due to your great success, you have been awarded high-roller status, and with it a complimentary room at the Laurel Palace."
"The Laurel Palace?" Cliff said. "We could never go there before. Good going Mr.!"
The clerk nodded. "Go pack your bags, our limo is waiting to take you to the Laurel Palace."
Mr. headed back to his room to grab the scant possessions he managed to bring with him on his sudden last-minute Las Vegas trip. "Imagine that, me, a high-roller. I'll miss this old room, but not too much. Well, I hope my limo is ready. Now it's off to the Laurel Palace."
A few minutes later, the limo had deposited Mr. at the Laurel Palace. Awestruck by the Greek architecture, Mr. temporarily forgot he was under time pressure to rescue Joe, and stopped to admire the new view. Finally, he unlocked the door to his luxurious new room. "Wow, check it out! A great room, and free to boot." Mr. looked at his watch and remembered that he had to pay the ransom to rescue his brother. "Well, time to get back to the casino. And, there'll be no stopping me 'til I reach
$10,000,000!"
Chapter 2: Dice, Dice, Baby
After a few drinks from the mini-bar in his room, Mr. walked around the casino and noticed the craps table. "I don't know to play this game, but that picture of a 1 and a 2 with the caption '15 to 1' looks appealing. I'll bet a thousand dollars on that." Mr., slightly drunk, attempted to pull out a few hundreds from his wallet, but accidentally placed his lottery ticket on the craps table. "Mr., have you finished your betting?" the croupier asked.
"Yes," Mr. answered, taking the dice and rolling them. They landed on 1 and 2. The croupier paid him $1,500,000 in casino chips. "Whoa, that's over a million dollars!" Mr. exclaimed.
"Well, yeah, that's how the game works," the croupier replied. "You bet $100,000, and we pay you 15 times that because you rolled a 1 and a 2."
"I bet that much?" Mr. said. "That was an accident, I swear! I didn't know I could bet that much!"
"There's no betting limit here at the Laurel Palace!" the croupier answered. "Why would we limit how much our high rollers can bet and win?"
"Holy crap!" Mr. muttered. "So what's this 'horn bet' mean?"
"We take your bet and evenly split it between the 1-1, 1-2, 5-6, and 6-6 rolls. If you get one of those, you win."
"I'm feeling lucky," Mr. said, "but I'm a little bit too tipsy to count my money correctly. Put $1,200,000 on the horn."
"Mr., have you finished your betting?"
"Yes."
Mr. was handed the dice again, and chucked them across the table. The result was 6 and 6, boxcars. "That pays 30 to 1," the croupier observed, "so you win 30 times $300,000, or $9,000,000." The croupier returned the entirety of Mr.'s original bet to him, plus an additional $9,000,000, taking him to $10,601,000. The casino's marching band returned to perform an encore of their previous victorious fanfare, bringing back their flashing "congratulations" sign.
"Sorry I'm late!" Cliff panted as he ran into the casino. "Are you ready to go to the blackjack table now?"
"Actually," Mr. said, pointing at his pile of chips, "I don't think I need to. Look what I did here at the craps table."
"Congratulations!" Cliff said, applauding his younger brother. "You now have over 10 million dollars! That's quite a sum that you have won! You are a very lucky person indeed, but I am sure it was not only your luck that let you succeed. So tell me now, what will you do with the money you have won? Please tell me your dreams..."
"I want to eat at Joe's!" Mr. responded without skipping a beat.
"That is a wonderful dream that you have," Cliff nodded. "Now, it is time to leave this desert land and make your dreams come true!"
"Leave?" Mr. objected. "Joe's restaurant is
here! He's been kidnapped
here!"
"Eh, close enough," Cliff resigned. "You can do it, and you will! Not just because you have power and good luck to help you through. Let us not waste any more time. Let's go!"
The marching band followed Mr. and Cliff back to their rooms, playing a victorious tune while one of them slowly read off a list of names. "Executive Producer, Satoru Iwata. Producer, Akihiro Saito. Director, Takashi Ambe. . ."
"What's that all about?" Cliff wondered.
"I don't recognize any of these names!" Mr. said. "Who names their kid something stupid like Satoru Iwata?"
Before Mr. entered his room again, one member of the marching band whispered to him, "You will eat at Joe's."
Epilogue: King of the Joe's
The next day, 24 hours after the ransom phone call, Mr. heard a knock at his hotel room door. Opening it, he saw the front desk clerk from the Golden Paradise on the other side. "So, do you have the ten million dollars?" he asked.
"Sure do!" Mr. said, proudly. "I have half of it in my wallet and half of it in casino chips. I always keep half of my money in my wallet. That way, if someone pickpockets me, I only lose
half of my possessions!"
"Excellent!" the clerk said. "Pay up!"
Mr. pulled out his money and counted out $10,000,000. "I have to say, while I've never had a relative kidnapped before, this was a fun experience. I gambled for the first time in my life, and you were also so cordial in checking me in at the front desk."
"Damn!" the clerk pouted. "I knew I was missing something -- a
disguise! I'm new to this kidnapping thing!"
"Oh, it's no problem!" Mr. said. "We all make mistakes."
"For example, some of us forget that hotels have security systems and cameras!" A cop interrupted the conversation to handcuff the clerk. "The jury won't be hung with evidence like this! Now tell us where Joe is, and you might get a plea deal."
"Joe's in room 13666!" the clerk exclaimed. "I hid him there because I figured superstitious people would be doubly afraid to look there."
"This hotel has a weird numbering system," the cop muttered. "4- and 5-digit room numbers on the first floor, with seemingly no pattern to them. Combined with the Golden Paradise's policy of giving people a battery to write down how much money they have and letting them return to that amount at any time, I'm amazed they're still in business!"
A fellow cop used a key card to unlock room 13666, across the hall from Mr.'s room 2425. Joe was bound and gagged there; after the ropes and gag were undone by the cop, Joe rushed over to Mr. and gave him a big hug. "Little bro! You saved me!" Joe cried.
Mr. hugged Joe back. "I never thought I'd see you alive again, or have so much fun gambling to save you!"
After pausing to let Joe and Mr. have a touching reunion, the cop put on his sunglasses. "Well, duty calls. I have to give a patron of the Buffalo Head a spiel that he should beware of con artists going around seeking money for a medical emergency."
Suddenly, the craps croupier from the Laurel Palace rushed into the room. "Oh, Mr.!" he exclaimed. "I hate to inform you, but I accidentally returned your entire $1,200,000 horn bet to you last night during craps! I was only supposed to return a quarter of it, corresponding to the $300,000 you placed on boxcars. I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to seize $900,000 from you so that we're even."
"Oh, it's fine," Mr. said. "We all make mistakes sometimes. It happens!"
The croupier took his $900,000 and left. Mr. counted his remaining money. "Ah, fudge," Mr. droned. "Now I only have $9,701,000. That's not $10,000,000."
"Should I call my kidnapper back and tell him you don't have the ransom money after all?" Joe asked.
"Nah."
THE END
YOU WILL EAT AT JOE'S