Game description
The good Mecha Santa plans to spread happiness and cheer all over the world. Princess Pitch, previously just a sidekick in Garden Gnome Carnage, sets out to put an end to those silly plans. This time around Princess Pitch decides to take on Mecha Santa and his army of robot elves on a difficulty harder than the hardest since it's too easy otherwise.
Game objectives
  • Emulator used: Hourglass -r81
  • Game version: 1.3
  • Hardest difficulty, "Reallyjoel's Mom"
  • Aims for fastest time
  • No damage taken
Emulator Configuration
Set "Multithreading and Wait Sync" to Wrap. Set FPS to 40
The game can be downloaded at Daniel Remar's homepage at http://www.remar.se/daniel/pitch.php Make sure to use the "pitch gm5.exe" executable.
WARNING! STABILITY ISSUE! If you try to playback this game on Windows 8.1, DO NOT USE SAVESTATES since that crashed my Windows and I had to reboot my computer. It could be playbacked on Windows 7 as well, though savestates doesn't seem to work. Not as terrible as on Windows 8.1 at least. Windows XP works flawlessly with this game, which is also the operating system I used to record this game.
Note to Encoders The submitted file finishes the game as quickly as possible, skipping both the ending credits and stats screens. Here's an alternate file which includes these two as they'll make the run more enjoyable to watch.

Explanation of the difficulty
Reallyjoel's Mom is a hidden difficulty which you unlock by holding right for 10 seconds in the difficulty screen. Basically, it's a joke difficulty based on the fact it was in no way meant to be winnable.
A lot more enemies spawn in every room and they have a much higher rate of fire. Now even the robot elves shoot at you, and they're one of the most abundant enemy you'll meet. Of course the bosses themselves are notched up quite a bit as well, but interestingly all enemies still have normal health. (Bosses still have their desperation mode of course)
All powerups are disabled and you can't summon your mother, so you'll have to survive all this with just 8 worth of ammo for your Ice and Rainbow weapons as well as no extra lives. Although you'll still get an extra life for finishing a stage.
Just in comparison, surviving the first room is quite hard, surviving the second room is close to impossible and surviving the third room after the first two is impossible.
Trick used:
  • Piledrives
This is an ability you can activate by pressing either up, down, left, right, or up, down, right, left. When you activate it you'll become almost perfectly invulnerable, being able to block anything except for the bosses themselves. What this also does is if any enemy (except for bosses) touch you during this time, you'll immediately grab and piledrive them, effectively destroying any non-boss enemy and dealing 8 damage to surrounding enemies where you land. Yes, even large trains, walkers, mini-bosses and turrets.
While in the air you can also throw the grabbed target in order to reach enemies farther away. Granted it'll take a little longer to land again, but it's useful whenever you'd hit more enemies by throwing your target at them.
The piledrive will activate the same frame you input the last movement and will last for 30 frames. When you grab an enemy, it'll take 40 frames before you land again, and up to 64 frames depending on when you throw them. If you throw them on the first possible frame, it'll take just as long as a normal piledrive.
The exact frame you land on you'll be able to initiate a new piledrive. It just so happens that this frame and the next one are invulnerability frames where you won't take any damage. You become vulnerable again on the third frame, and invulnerable again on the fourth frame as you finish the next piledrive. This means there's a one frame window you have to make sure not to get hit while making consecutive piledrives... which is much harder than it sounds like.
If you throw an enemy you won't have these two invulnerability frames, so it depends on the enemy where you can use them.
If you fail to grab an enemy you'll become vulnerable on the same frame it ends, and you won't be able to initiate a new piledrive until the second frame. This means you'll have four vulnerable frames between two piledrives, since the fifth frame makes you invulnerable again.
If you've fired recently, you must wait one frame before you can initiate a piledrive.
Weapons used:
  • Brick
The standard weapon in the game. It fires a brick in a straight line every four frames which does 1 damage per hit. That's 0.25 damage/frame.
  • Ice
One of the two side weapons you can use. It fires a short range fan of ice bits in quick succession. One shot on the first two frames. Then two shots on the next three frames, dealing 0.5 damage per hit. That's 0.3 damage/frame.
  • Rainbow
The second of the two side weapons you can use. It fires one projectile every ten frames in a straight line which can bounce off the wall twice before it either dissapears or hits and enemy, dealing 3 damage. That's 0.3 damage/frame.
About the run Piledrives, piledrives, piledrives! That trick is the only reason this run is possible, so expect to see a lot of them throughout the run. Of course there's a lot of action which doesn't involve piledrives, like seeing how nasty certain rooms and enemies will behave on this difficulty and how I'm able to handle them. It's a mix between destroying all enemies just as I approach the door to the next room and finding that one spot in which I'll survive before initiating the next piledrive.Then of course there's the bosses who all tries to kill me with a passion worthy of praise, which I reward by shooting bricks into their faces.
If you enjoy fast-paced arcade action games, then you'll surely enjoy one with a difficulty that was never meant to be beatable.
Last shot against Mecha Santa at frame 37060. Last input at frame 37619.
Stages:
  • Stage 1:
I'm quickly introduced to the difficulty as I enter the complex by being shot at by 68 elves instead of 20 rushing me (which is the enemy count on Goddess of Explosion difficulty), but all enemies are quickly dispatched as I advance through the rooms. The path I've taken through the stage is the fastest since I have to avoid rooms with the toy trains. 3,4 times more enemies (not sure if this value is constant throughout the run though) in rooms where they can only spawn at a fixed, slow rate are rooms I have to avoid at all cost. They are normally also quite boring to watch too.
The first boss is defeated fast enough as long as I made sure all shots hit and avoid every projectile he fires back at me. It's actually possible to kill the elf on top of the sleigh before he hides behind the cannon, but what's the fun in making it easier for you?
  • Stage 2:
Same as on Stage 1 I have to avoid rooms with toy trains and make sure I'm as close to the next room as possible when I defeat the last enemy. Unfortunately I'll have to fight another type of slow-spawning enemy in the first room, the sweeper bots. No idea what its official name is, so I'll just name them what I think they look like. Thankfully I can make use of their slow speed to play around before it's time to move on. On a side note, I'll only grab presents if I won't lose any time by doing so, which is why I sometimes skip them and sometimes get them. I also destroy the explosive barrels in the room before the boss just for entertainment. The few enemies I could kill with them are insignificant since enemies will continually spawn for 25 seconds in that room, which would've been killed by my piledrives anyway.
The second boss has a field of spiked balls which protects him as long as the turrets are alive. As soon as they're destroyed, you can begin killing him. Interestingly you can piledrive the turrets as they're falling down, and you can also make us of this to throw one of them on the boss, dealing 8 damage to him. If you grab the turret as far down as possible, as you land there'll be a narrow 4 frame window where you can hit the boss by tossing the turret at him. Thanks to Truncated for suggesting this might be possible! Apart from that I just make sure every shot hit as he does his final attack.
  • Stage 3:
On this stage I just try to plow through each room as fast as possible while avoiding paths that lead to toy trains and the goo balls. I do get to meet the Ufo though, and he certainly doesn't like me. But by twitching around on the same spot just below him he'll get indecisive and let me fire a few more shots before the sleigh brigade arrives. Also some more fun with sweeper bots.
This boss gives me a lot more problem since the green and black shots can both block my attacks, so I had to dance around quite a bit in order to always keep a constant rate of fire. Also the green spikey shots he fires when his final attack begins can also block my shots, so I have to use my piledrive to block them. In order to reach the secret level to get the best ending, I have to piledrive the laser when he fires it. That'll both open the secret passage and deal 30 damage to the boss. Shame I only got time to counter it once though.
  • Stage X:
The secret stage of the game. Here I unfortunately have to fight the toy trains in one room, so I picked the one which takes the least amount of time. Bonus it's also the least boring one as well. I also get to meet the eyes on legs too, an enemy so weak both my Brick and Rainbow blasts through several of them per shot. They also make the game perform a bit slower when I'm piledriving too many of them at once. This doesn't seem to generate any lag frames oddly enough, must just be my laptop that's slow.
No bosses on this level, only the Goddess of Explosions who gives me the Galactic Princess Buster.
  • Stage 4:
Final stage of the game. Since the rooms loop around everywhere, I really had to test the various paths to find the best one. Apart from that, I just go through the rooms and eliminate any resistance I come across.
The last boss, Mecha Santa. He. Is. NASTY on this difficulty, and it doesn't get easier since all of his shots as well as his big hands both block my attacks. This means I have to try to both get some hits on him in between his barrages and enough space to dodge his attacks at the same time. Of course you can reflect the Giga Bomb Breaker back at him and deal a nice chunk of damage. Then there's his Aurora Force... I have to piledrive as much as I did during the Arctic Thunder. His cycles are timed just enough to catch up to me had I not walked down as much as I could as I activate a new piledrive. Then I just need to dodge the Deep Freeze and fire on.
Possible improvements:
  • Tighter optimization.
Since so many enemies appear in every room, I'm sure there'll always be a possibility to optimize a few more kills here and there to make everything a teeny bit faster.
  • Better use of Rainbow.
Due to an earlier claim that Mecha Santa was impossible to beat without more extra lives, I made an early descision to save up on my Rainbow ammo for the final fight just in case it would turn into a death race of who beats who first. Otherwise I could've used it more for other hard to reach enemies, like the four three turrets on the second boss. Although I don't know how much time that would've saved compared to using them all on Mecha Santa... or if it would save time at all since they do help me get some trick shots on Santa which Bricks wouldn't be able to hit.
  • Minor issue
During the black screens after I defeat each boss, before the !!!Stage Clear!!! screen, the framerate is lowered to 20. Since Hourglass forces 40 frames per second even during these black screens, it'll thus count two frames for each frame that passes. Thankfully these won't last for too long, so it's not too many extra frames.

Truncated: Oh I am SO judging this.
Truncated: This has had very good viewer response. Tight action and Swenglish voice acting, and 7 enemies killed per second. All this in a difficulty level which is supposed to be impossible. Easily accepted.
feos: Grabbing...

Patashu
He/Him
Joined: 10/2/2005
Posts: 4016
GeminiSaint wrote:
What's that shield thing that seems to absorb enemy shots? It was mostly used on the final boss, but I didn't see it explained anywhere in the submission comments.
The piledriver is also called the 'counter'. It puts you in a state of invulnerability (blue flash = blocked shot) and if an enemy comes in reach during this you initiate the 'piledriver'. Probably the TAS description could make it a bit clearer that these two things are the same move.
My Chiptune music, made in Famitracker: http://soundcloud.com/patashu My twitch. I stream mostly shmups & rhythm games http://twitch.tv/patashu My youtube, again shmups and rhythm games and misc stuff: http://youtube.com/user/patashu
Joined: 5/29/2004
Posts: 757
WTF have they done to Smash TV? This is seriously crack-o-riffic! But I ALMOST voted MEH because it didn't get a 1st place score... But the rest of it presented an easy Yes vote. Mr. Kelly R. Flewin
Mr. Kelly R. Flewin Just another random gamer ---- <OmnipotentEntity> How do you people get bored in the span of 10 seconds? Worst ADD ever.
NitroGenesis
He/Him
Editor, Experienced player (551)
Joined: 12/24/2009
Posts: 1873
There were lots of bright colors and explosions. If I had a 3 year old son he would surely enjoy this movie. Anyway I liked it. Here's a yes vote.
YoungJ1997lol wrote:
Normally i would say Yes, but thennI thought "its not the same hack" so ill stick with meh.
Editor, Skilled player (1404)
Joined: 3/31/2010
Posts: 2086
All this action and crazy antics, and yet the movie doesn't get the high score. Tsk, tsk, tsk. In all seriousness, this was incredible. The sheer number of enemies on the screen was staggering, and the entire movie was really fast paced and frantic. Easy yes vote for an awesome run.
Patashu
He/Him
Joined: 10/2/2005
Posts: 4016
(FWIW, on hyper princess pitch it's really hard to get points because there are zero powerups/bonuses to collect)
My Chiptune music, made in Famitracker: http://soundcloud.com/patashu My twitch. I stream mostly shmups & rhythm games http://twitch.tv/patashu My youtube, again shmups and rhythm games and misc stuff: http://youtube.com/user/patashu
Active player (456)
Joined: 11/12/2010
Posts: 183
Location: Sweden
Nach wrote:
Thank for the info. Anyways, after I watched this run, best choice is to vote no, for the following reasons: Should've played with Daisy at the same time. You did not acquire the travel luggage. You did not acquire the 2600 inch television. You did not acquire the exciting home game.
Of course I acquired those three! I got the travel luggage at 2:48, the television at 7:30 and the home game at 9:35. I couldn't manage to play with Daisy at the same time however since she was busy waiting for the gifts SHE would've gotten for christmas. I admit I forgot to mention that the piledrive/counter moves are the same thing. Thanks for clarifying it in my place.
"An artist who can’t take constructive critique on their work is only hurting themselves and their potential. Conversely, and artist that can’t communicate a critique in a constructive way isn’t helping anybody."
Editor, Skilled player (1172)
Joined: 9/27/2008
Posts: 1085
I actually prefer the 2nd place in the high scores. It tells me that whoever is going through this insanity, perhaps blindfolded and doing dishes at the same time, is also modest enough to remain in 2nd place even through the legions you find in this difficulty. Besides, it's too easy to find a few things the TAS skips to make up that last bit of difference to hit the top spot. If someone ever produces an improvement to this run, I would suggest getting within one point of the 1st place score if possible. Show TAS control over score even as you fight through this insane difficulty!
Editor
Joined: 3/10/2010
Posts: 899
Location: Sweden
I vote that we hack the pool options to replace yes with "Awesome".
Active player (432)
Joined: 4/21/2004
Posts: 3517
Location: Stockholm, Sweden
This will be a fine addition to our library of movies :) Clear yes vote. The last boss reminded me of those impossible japanese games that moozooh was/is obsessed about :)
Nitrogenesis wrote:
Guys I come from the DidyKnogRacist communite, and you are all wrong, tihs is the run of the mileniun and everyone who says otherwise dosnt know any bater! I found this run vary ease to masturbate too!!!! Don't fuck with me, I know this game so that mean I'm always right!StupedfackincommunityTASVideoz!!!!!!
Arc wrote:
I enjoyed this movie in which hands firmly gripping a shaft lead to balls deep in multiple holes.
natt wrote:
I don't want to get involved in this discussion, but as a point of fact C# is literally the first goddamn thing on that fucking page you linked did you even fucking read it
Cooljay wrote:
Mayor Haggar and Cody are such nice people for the community. Metro City's hospitals reached an all time new record of incoming patients due to their great efforts :P
Sir_VG
He/Him
Player (39)
Joined: 10/9/2004
Posts: 1911
Location: Floating Tower
Voting No because Reallyjoel's Mom got a higher score than you. Thanks for playing, try again.
Taking over the world, one game at a time. Currently TASing: Nothing
Emulator Coder
Joined: 3/9/2004
Posts: 4588
Location: In his lab studying psychology to find new ways to torture TASers and forumers
Tseralith wrote:
Nach wrote:
Anyways, after I watched this run, best choice is to vote no, for the following reasons: Should've played with Daisy at the same time. You did not acquire the travel luggage. You did not acquire the 2600 inch television. You did not acquire the exciting home game.
Of course I acquired those three! I got the travel luggage at 2:48, the television at 7:30 and the home game at 9:35.
I didn't see that, I guess there's too many enemies on the screen. Also, you seemed to skip the item tallies at the end of each level where you get to flex your arm muscles.
Tseralith wrote:
I couldn't manage to play with Daisy at the same time however since she was busy waiting for the gifts SHE would've gotten for christmas.
That makes sense for the first quest, but you really should TAS the second quest with Daisy (or is it Dizzy in this universe?) unlocked.
Warning: Opinions expressed by Nach or others in this post do not necessarily reflect the views, opinions, or position of Nach himself on the matter(s) being discussed therein.
Site Admin, Skilled player (1236)
Joined: 4/17/2010
Posts: 11267
Location: RU
I'll be publishing it.
Warning: When making decisions, I try to collect as much data as possible before actually deciding. I try to abstract away and see the principles behind real world events and people's opinions. I try to generalize them and turn into something clear and reusable. I hate depending on unpredictable and having to make lottery guesses. Any problem can be solved by systems thinking and acting.
Editor, Experienced player (608)
Joined: 11/8/2010
Posts: 4012
This is a great run. Full of action, and completed on a difficulty that's supposed to be impossible! Also enjoyed following the WIPs. Yes vote!
Active player (456)
Joined: 11/12/2010
Posts: 183
Location: Sweden
Nach wrote:
I didn't see that, I guess there's too many enemies on the screen. Also, you seemed to skip the item tallies at the end of each level where you get to flex your arm muscles.
What? You mean flying through the air propelled by the explosion you just caused behind you isn't good enough? I can go as far as flexing my legs as I soar through the air if that'll make you satisfied.
Nach wrote:
That makes sense for the first quest, but you really should TAS the second quest with Daisy (or is it Dizzy in this universe?) unlocked.
Well... considering I just blew up that part of the universe, I'm unsure whether Daisy is available at all for the second quest. Maybe you have to enter a secret code to access her? I don't know that code though. Anyhow I'm glad everyone enjoyed the run!
"An artist who can’t take constructive critique on their work is only hurting themselves and their potential. Conversely, and artist that can’t communicate a critique in a constructive way isn’t helping anybody."
mklip2001
He/Him
Editor
Joined: 6/23/2009
Posts: 2224
Location: Georgia, USA
Wow, this really is Smash TV with a cuter main character, at least 3 times as many enemies, and even more ridiculousness. The final boss alone makes an incredible watch. It definitely feels completely superhuman, but then again, I feel like similar crazy weaving through bullets have been accomplished in real time by Toho players. I vote Star.
Used to be a frequent submissions commenter. My new computer has had some issues running emulators, so I've been here more sporadically. Still haven't gotten around to actually TASing yet... I was going to improve Kid Dracula for GB. It seems I was beaten to it, though, with a recent awesome run by Hetfield90 and StarvinStruthers. (http://tasvideos.org/2928M.html.) Thanks to goofydylan8 for running Gargoyle's Quest 2 because I mentioned the game! (http://tasvideos.org/2001M.html) Thanks to feos and MESHUGGAH for taking up runs of Duck Tales 2 because of my old signature! Thanks also to Samsara for finishing a Treasure Master run. From the submission comments:
Shoutouts and thanks to mklip2001 for arguably being the nicest and most supportive person on the forums.
xRavenXP
He/Him
Joined: 4/15/2012
Posts: 116
Location: Brazil
Epic video and accuracy. I vote yes, this video deserves a star tier!
I love games and love to record videos (longplays). Visit my Youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/user/xRavenXP
Editor, Reviewer, Experienced player (968)
Joined: 4/17/2004
Posts: 3107
Location: Sweden
As I already said in the topic for this game, this TAS is amazing. Impossible joke difficulties are great for TASes. I vote YES, of course. One thing which perhaps should be mentioned in the submission text is that the Ice weapon blocks enemy shots, which is how you manage to beat the UFO without taking damage.
Aqfaq wrote:
Looks like the bodycount almost equals the framecount.
The game helpfully lists the number of killed enemies at the end of the run. While the kills are not quite as many as the frames, it is still over 7 enemies killed per second, including menus and cutscenes. :O I'm pretty sure that's a record.
Patashu
He/Him
Joined: 10/2/2005
Posts: 4016
So, why hasn't this been uploaded to nicovideo yet? Bitrate restrictions can't handle the epicness that is 1000 elves all shooting at once? ;)
My Chiptune music, made in Famitracker: http://soundcloud.com/patashu My twitch. I stream mostly shmups & rhythm games http://twitch.tv/patashu My youtube, again shmups and rhythm games and misc stuff: http://youtube.com/user/patashu
Emulator Coder, Skilled player (1141)
Joined: 5/1/2010
Posts: 1217
mklip2001 wrote:
It definitely feels completely superhuman, but then again, I feel like similar crazy weaving through bullets have been accomplished in real time by Toho players.
Doesn't Touhou like typical shumps have pretty forgiving hitboxes, while this one doesn't? And the bullets are probably not the only hazards. If enemies have any sort of contact damage, those sort of swarms would probably do damage VERY fast without invincibility.
Patashu
He/Him
Joined: 10/2/2005
Posts: 4016
The elves ONLY shoot on this difficulty level. Running into enemies hurts you.
My Chiptune music, made in Famitracker: http://soundcloud.com/patashu My twitch. I stream mostly shmups & rhythm games http://twitch.tv/patashu My youtube, again shmups and rhythm games and misc stuff: http://youtube.com/user/patashu
Active player (456)
Joined: 11/12/2010
Posts: 183
Location: Sweden
Truncated wrote:
One thing which perhaps should be mentioned in the submission text is that the Ice weapon blocks enemy shots, which is how you manage to beat the UFO without taking damage.
Oh, whoops. Always is there something you forget to mention. And yep, touching any enemy would hurt me had I not activated my piledrive just in time. What also makes this harder in one way compared to the Touhou games is that you have to do frame perfect piledrives and find spots where you won't get hit for one frame. Of course Pitch's hitbox and the irregular fire from the enemy doesn't make it easier, since enemies don't always shoot straight towards you.
"An artist who can’t take constructive critique on their work is only hurting themselves and their potential. Conversely, and artist that can’t communicate a critique in a constructive way isn’t helping anybody."
Skilled player (1706)
Joined: 9/17/2009
Posts: 4952
Location: ̶C̶a̶n̶a̶d̶a̶ "Kanatah"
Truncated wrote:
As I already said in the topic for this game, this TAS is amazing. Impossible joke difficulties are great for TASes. I vote YES, of course.
Well, it depends on what game... ;P
Editor, Skilled player (1505)
Joined: 7/9/2010
Posts: 1317
Princess saved the world. Oh no, she didn't. Whatever, yes vote. This was nice.
Favorite animal: STOCK Gt(ROSA)26Sortm1.1(rtTA,EGFP)Nagy Grm7Tg(SMN2)89Ahmb Smn1tm1Msd Tg(SMN2*delta7)4299Ahmb Tg(tetO-SMN2,-luc)#aAhmb/J YouTube Twitch
YaLTeR
He/Him
Joined: 12/2/2011
Posts: 129
Location: Moscow, Russia
This is spectacular. Amazing TAS. The picture on the Stage Clear screens just fits it perfectly IMO. Also such a game. Insta-YES, deserves a star!
Emulator Coder
Joined: 3/9/2004
Posts: 4588
Location: In his lab studying psychology to find new ways to torture TASers and forumers
Tseralith wrote:
Nach wrote:
I didn't see that, I guess there's too many enemies on the screen. Also, you seemed to skip the item tallies at the end of each level where you get to flex your arm muscles.
What? You mean flying through the air propelled by the explosion you just caused behind you isn't good enough? I can go as far as flexing my legs as I soar through the air if that'll make you satisfied.
My point wasn't flexing your muscles. My point was seeing the items tallied, I want to see which fabulous prizes you collected. Did you get a year's supply of meat? Big money big prizes, I love it.
Tseralith wrote:
Well... considering I just blew up that part of the universe, I'm unsure whether Daisy is available at all for the second quest. Maybe you have to enter a secret code to access her? I don't know that code though.
There's a whole bunch of codes listed when you beat the game. Although, did you even beat the game? Until the MC himself is dead, the game ain't over. If you in fact did not beat MC Mutoid Man, can we even consider this run as beating the game? Runs have to complete the game to be eligible for acceptance.
Warning: Opinions expressed by Nach or others in this post do not necessarily reflect the views, opinions, or position of Nach himself on the matter(s) being discussed therein.