Quick suggestion you or others with depression may want to look into: Have you ever heard of
MBTI? It's no exact science, but it is a good tool to find out how like-minded people have gotten through situations and struggles you may be going through (depression and otherwise). MBTI is very well known throughout the world.
Once you type yourself using the above link, which is pretty straightforward and quick, you can google the acronym that corresponds to you (of a possible 16) and read some descriptions to see if it seems to match you and your personality. If you feel it does, perhaps google some more about the type and how people like that have dealt with depression in their lives. If it doesn't feel relatable, consider using
this questionnaire that will give you estimates (as percentages) of which way you lean between the 8 functions.
Again, this isn't a science whatsoever, as the massive variances in people is always a factor. But you may still find it useful for potentially learning/rediscovering some things about yourself, and/or finding like-minded people. If you do end up relating to a type description, just use it as a rough guide and try to avoid boxing yourself into a label. Everyone is extremely different and basically living a completely other life from anyone else due to the veil of perspective everyone has constantly distorting reality.
Also, I'd like to note that for you specifically, MUGG, I understand you feel no one around you currently cares about your life. But always know that your being and actions you've made have impacted multiple friends and acquaintances around the world in positive ways from your impressive speed run work, and more. That includes me who is always looking forward to what you have to upload next. I have huge respect for you man, and I really hope your future is brighter than your past.
